Earl Grey Tea

By Libby

Why do some of us reach for tea, and particularly Earl Grey, when we feel anxious or upset, or want to comfort others? Is it a need to lose ourselves in the actions of making tea? Or do we perhaps instinctively know that sipping a fragrant brew will have a calming effect?

And why this opening about tea and comfort? Well, blame Peter Morrow!  Louise Penny's writing does tend to lead you down all sorts of rabbit holes!

'Peter was willing the water to boil so he could make tea and then all this would go away. Maybe, said his brain and his upbringing, if you make enough tea and small talk, time reverses and all bad things are undone. But he’d lived too long with Clara to be able to hide in denial. Jane was dead. Killed. And he needed to comfort Clara and somehow make it all right. And he didn’t know how. Rummaging through the cupboard like a wartime surgeon frantically searching for the right bandage...his hand clutched the box just as the kettle whistled. Violent death demanded Earl Grey.' (Still Life, Kindle p.53)

Peter's initial response to Clara's grief is painfully awkward, and then strangely decisive as he seizes upon his tea of choice. He is distracted by his own emotional turmoil and we're left wondering if his instincts are at all attuned to Clara's needs.

But what a good line: 'Violent death demanded Earl Grey.'

It made me reflect on giving comfort, and also the capacity for human grace. Louise Penny provides a telling insight through her short-lived character, Jane Neal.

How do we provide comfort and support to others, particularly when someone is experiencing loss and grief. What to say? What to do? How do you get past yourself, your own discomfit, sometimes even a measure of arrogance, and really think of someone else, see it from their perspective? It's difficult when you're primarily viewing things from your own perspective, as Peter initially does.

It's a matter of trying to put yourself into someone else's shoes, and genuinely understand what they're experiencing. It's also about learning from others. Clara understood that.

'What would Jane do?...Jane would let her cry, would let her wail. Would let her throw crockery, if she needed to. And Jane would not run away. When the maelstrom passed, Jane would be there. And then she would put her arms around Clara, and comfort her, and let her know she was not alone. Never alone. And so Clara sat and watched and waited. And knew the agony of doing nothing. Slowly the crying subsided. Clara rose with exaggerated calm. She took Jane in her arms and felt the old body creak back into place. Then she said a little prayer of thanks to the gods that give grace. The grace to cry and the grace to watch.' (Still Life, Kindle p.8)

Louise Penny reminds us of our foibles, and importantly, our capacity for grace. There are some people, like Jane, who just seem to know what to do, and have remarkable empathy. While reflecting on that, I thought of a dear friend.

She recently composed and sang a tribute to her dying friend on behalf of their circle of friends (it had to be done over speaker phone as her friend was no longer able to receive visitors). Her friend, still lucid, loved it. The next day she died.

What an amazing  gift of comfort and recognition. How difficult that must have been, knowing that it was a final farewell. I was very moved by the empathy it demonstrated and was left wondering if I could be quite so intuitive and selfless. I hope so.

Of course at times it can simply be a matter of holding someone, allowing them to relax into a hug that has expressed, more than words, "I'm here, I'm attentive, I understand"; or letting them talk and even hit out; providing practical assistance when loss and grief is crippling.

Peter, too, manages to step outside of himself.

'For the first time in his life he asked what someone else would do. What would Jane do if she was here and he was dead? And he had his answer. Silently he lay down beside Clara and wrapped himself around her. And for the first time since getting the news, her heart and mind calmed. They settled, just for one blessed instant, on a place that held love, not loss.' (Still Life, Kindle p.88)

Does he genuinely try to understand what Clara is experiencing, though? While racing to 'somehow make it alright' he seems to be oblivious that loss and grief are a deeply personal experience that doesn't come in a neat package, with a timetable attached.

'Lying all night, holding Clara, he’d dared to hope that the worst was over. That maybe the grief, while still there, would today allow some of his wife to be present. But the woman he knew and loved had been swallowed up. Like Jonah. Her white whale of sorrow and loss in an ocean of body fluid.' (Still Life, Kindle p.89)

Peter struggles with disruption to his life. Life for him is controlled and focused (like his measured, hyper-real paintings), with Clara at its core. He wants to restore normalcy as neatly and quickly as possible.

I'm reminded, of coping with disruption in my own life. When your child is devastated by an unexpected and shocking relationship breakup, you suffer with them. It is so hard to see them grappling with the hurt and uncertainty it has brought to their life, and the fear. You want it to be over as quickly as possible, perhaps a little impatiently (shouldn't she be over this by now?) with minimal scarring, for their sake as well as your own, so the hurt and worry can stop. And when finally she says, "It's taken three years, and I'm now in a good place", you realise they own the timetable.

Fortunately, Peter does have an epiphany, of sorts, after Clara hits back at his unholy haste for things to get back to 'normal'. He brings into question the conversations about faith between Clara and Jane that he has overheard for years, and provides the means for Clara to realise some genuine comfort.

'And suddenly her pain and grief became human and natural. And survivable.' (Still Life, Kindle p.93)

While Peter's actions remind us of tea and comfort in times of loss and grief, I have some fonder associations with Earl Grey.

It's my drink of choice to relax and engage in some pleasant reveries. I had never been a black tea drinker until I discovered the heady fragrance of Earl Grey. And I never appreciated it quite so much until I discovered the Earl Grey blend produced by Gillards of Bath, on a memorable trip to 'take the waters' and discover the Bath of Jane Austen's Persuasion. I enjoyed a wonderful, solitary morning tea at the Regency Tearooms in the Jane Austen Centre (well perhaps not quite so solitary as I did commune with Mr Darcy -- there are some things you just have to do), a beautifully fragrant brew accompanied by the best and lightest sugar bun I've ever tasted, seriously!

I can't help myself when it comes to finding out more about the foods I like to prepare and consume, including Earl Grey tea. This sort of stuff just interests me, in the same way I was drawn to the food and drink connections in the Louise Penny books.

Originally I thought Earl Grey tea was flavoured with the herb bergamot (Monarda Didyma) as it actually smells like the tea, but after a little research learned that it is flavoured with the essential oil from the bergamot orange. How much of that oil, and the blend of black teas that is used, determines the flavour of the tea. The following link provides information about the origins and making of Earl Grey tea. Now this is interesting stuff!

http://www.teatulia.com/tea-101/what-is-earl-grey-tea.htm

Peter Morrow's initial instincts were actually not altogether misplaced. There is some recent research that suggests black tea, generally, has calming effects, and that the bergamot in Earl Grey, in particular, has additional health benefits. Isn't it good to learn that the food or drink we love to consume, also has some health benefits?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3115689/Put-kettle-cup-tea-really-best-remedy-stress-caffeine-soothing-effect.html

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2109601/A-cup-Earl-Grey-doctor-away-Fruit-extract-help-lose-weight-lower-cholesterol-prevent-diabetes.html

Earl Grey tea needs to be enjoyed with a bit of grace and style, never on the run and certainly not with a tea bag. As an accompaniment, a thick slice of toasted, homemade sourdough grainy bread with lashings of  marmalade, made from home-grown Seville oranges with just the right note of bitterness, does me every time (no butter required). It balances beautifully with the smoky and fragrant tea, which I prefer to drink as it comes, straight out of the pot, though sometimes a slice of lemon adds pleasing acidity to the tea's perfume.

The whole thing is a delightful interlude on any given day, and a time for pleasant thoughts. And not such a solitary comfort, when dear friends come to mind. Recently while taking tea, I mused  and marvelled at the comfort and grace in a wonderful friendship with women who live on the other side of the world, and yet are ever present. It's a friendship more close, joyous and soul-nurturing than you would ever think possible with such geographical distance between us.

 















But Earl Grey is not just about a comforting and restorative drink. I discovered that it makes a wonderful flavoured ice-cream which lends itself perfectly to any orange-based dessert. Cream and whole milk that has been infused with Earl Grey tea is sieved over and mixed into beaten egg yolks and sugar, then gently cooked until the custard thickens. Churning the chilled custard, with the addition of some Cointreau at the end, results in a beautifully smooth and fragrant ice-cream.

Served with a delicate, orange custard tart and sticky orange and cumquat sauce, it's not exactly comfort food (being perhaps a tad too fussy for that), but usually reserved as a special dessert for a gathering of friends, which is where the comfort lies.

When the Three Pines' friends gather at the Morrows, shortly after Jane's death, it is to seek solace in each other's company. By necessity they assemble a meal of bought fast food so unlike their usual, convivial meals together. Nevertheless, all manner of salty, sweet and alcoholic choices are just the right accompaniment to the comfort of friends and their sense of belonging with each other at such a difficult time. And it's what grabs our hearts.

Finally, an irresistible quote from Neil Gaiman:

“Honestly, if you're given the choice between Armageddon or tea, you don't say 'what kind of tea?”  

Well.....Earl Grey?